I am the Doppleganger

On the other side of a chain link fence
I can see the woman I want to be
I've looked for the gate
But I don't even know how to start the journey
I gaze between the chains at her
Pure smile, her lovely laughter, her beauty overflows from within
On this side, ther is only a mean, bitter woman
A woman without friends, because she can't keep them
A woman without lovers, because they can see her black soul
A woman without children, because God protects the little ones
Over there, she loves all and is loved by all
Her husband is grateful to wake up with her
And her children are good
What will it take?

Random bits and pieces

Autumn is one big audition.
Each leaf falls like a ballerina
Twisting and twirling in her first (and only) solo.

Life is ugly, squirming, and messy

...and then the clouds burst into flame...

Why is dog man's best friend? What do they have that I don't?

"Alea Jacta Est" -Caesar

To my Boobs

To those fraternal twins peeking over my shirt.
To those two water balloons under my skin.
Bouncing gently with every step.
Boost you up,
Squish you down,
Still there you are undaunted.
My orbs of seduction.
My shy, modest orbs of seduction.

Just Me

Once I wanted to be skinny
Once I wanted to be blonde
Once I wanted bright blue eyes
Once I wanted an elven face
Once I wanted 36-24-28
Once I wanted to be slight and short
Once I wanted perfect skin, perfect hair, and expensive clothes.
Once I wanted to be tan.

Then one day, not so long ago, my mother flipped my world.
"White is beautiful, too."

Now I love my blue white skin
Now I love my freckles, my curls, and my stains
Now I love looking you in the eye
Now I love my 38-32-44
Now I love my jowls
Now I love my hazel eyes
Now I love my dun colored hair
Now I love my muffin top
Now I love me.

While noticing unfamiliar toothmarks on a favorite pen

Staring at the teeth marks on the cap of my pen, I wonder whose they are.
They aren't mine. I don't have that habit.
Where have you been, little pen?
Did some fourth grader gnaw her frustrations on you while she took a test?
Did some foreign poet nibble on you while he composed a sonnet to his love?
Did some senator chew absentmindedly on you while wondering if he had time to run to the bathroom?
Or did some forgetful college student drop you on the floor and her dog took an inquisitive bite or two? I need to take better care of my pens.

Love Thyself

Because today, the only mail I got was bills,
And the only chocolate I ate was mine,
And the words of endearment I heard came from the TV.
Because tomorrow is the same as yesterday,
and I am unchanging.
Still afraid to smile because I have chocolate clinging to my teeth.

Six word short story

Missing: romance. Call husband if found.

To all the happy squirrels

Before Grover flies across the screen in his red cape
Before King Friday gives his newest proclamation
There is a hippie with a pallette.
His calm, soothing, gentle voice teaches me the difference between burnt umber and sienna before I can spell "yellow".
I watch him take a blank canvas and dextriously create a beautiful forest with a puddly path.
As his knife puts a shine on the water, I stomp in the puddles.
As he adds branches to his pines, together we imagine a happy squirrel bounding home, his cheeks full.
And as he dries his brushes by "beating the devil out of them," I giggle.
During that quiet, still half hour in the living room, I am completely immersed in his magic
Watching him create a world just for me.

-in memory of Bob Ross